Realised it's been 3 months since i last blogged. Aug is coming, time flies.
Many things have happened since the last entry. For one, I've stepped down as a CGL. Many have asked why. Well it is not easy to explain as some of those who have stepped down as well will be able to identify with me. Did something happen? was it something I saw or heard? Was I offended by someone?
I doubt anyone will read this but I think I will want to pen somethings down before it gets deleted from my memory. It is a hard decision to make. After 6.5 years. Some 300 over sermon and cell grp meetings that I have conducted, I've decided to stop. Do I miss taking a cell grp, conducting a meeting? Yes.
the first ever cell grp meeting that I have attended was at jelaine's place. That was in Jurong East back then. When i was in secondary school. I love the warmth and the chance to see how a Christian house was like, how the culture is like. How serious people were with God and religion. That's my introduction to application Christianity. How people said grace. How people worship God in the confort of their home. How they shared about their lives and encourage one another in whatever trials someone is going through in the pack. How there was a strong hope for a better life. a vision to work towards. I wanted my life to be like that in the future.
Things have changed. perhaps after the incident, we were much more relaxed. Things are optional. Often it is not what happens to an organization that shows it's strength but how it reacts to a situation that shows its true character. So how did we react to the incident? How did we fair? Why ask for suggestions when it is only a talk-cock exercise? we do not want wayang bikin, we want real solutions to real problems. Why set up a school only so that someone's KPI is met? job creation? whatever generates more harm than good must be stopped immediately. Things have to be tracked. Lives we are talking about. Seriousness have died. A tree is known by its fruit. If I want to know a tree, I just need to look at the PA and I know what is acceptable what is not. You have no character whatsoever. It is disgusting. where is the progess? Where is the plan? and the continuity plan? are you all stupid or what? We need brains. God gave them, so use them. Perhaps only 1 man is using his brains. Not enough.
So well, I have decided to pull out my resources. No, I'm still tithing. My time is devoted elsewhere. My precious - my wife, has been pulled out. Crap. Not easy to answer the same questions in every interview... Finally. Hope that things will get better.
As for me, I've been traveling. Yeah, it is tiring. but it is interesting. After a few trips to vietnam with the wife and colleague, I went to Bangkok with my mom and the week after, to hong kong with the wife and the week after to China for work. Now I'm back, I'm told I'll be going to Taiwan in 2 weeks' time. And China probably a week after Taiwan.
Interesting to note that throughout all these traveling, I miss my wife. thought of her in the hotel room, thought of her in the plane. Remembered the time I hostipalised and she was there taking care of me. Someone once said that when you are dead drunk, and someone sends you home to your doorstep, you will always remember this person. I am never drunk. Almost in China, but no. But I remember who takes care of me. Who changed the dressing to my wounds. Who helped me when I needed help. Who was there to lift me up when I was almost out. I remember.
On another note, I just spent some time on a saturday playing "Take my life". Not the latest song. Been a while since I've been to church it feels. Most songs are foreign to me. But it;s good to strum the guitar once again.
